Sometimes

I don't like to think I'm pretending, but
I guess that's what
It Is.

I don't like to think I'm writing this for anyone, but
I guess
I am.

I don't like to admit I'm scared, but
I know
I am.

I don't want to live in the future, but
I'm not always in
the present.

I know this earth is beautiful, but sometimes I wish I could just be
in heaven.

Will I become everything I know I can be?
Will I fulfill the dreams that I always see?

Somewhere in my heart space, will I tap into the essence of me?
I don't like to think of what couldn't be,
but how could I not?

I love remembering, but sometimes I wish I never forgot.

Writing is my life, but I usually dread the next line.
Words are everything to me,
but sometimes I wishh I didn't rhyme.

When I think about the Universe and where it is that I fit in,
I feel my heart explode with bliss,
I feel everything I have to give.

There's a difference between existing and living in your truth,
So close your eyes and take a step into your joyful youth.

Remember how it felt to run through the grass with your arms open wide?
Remember what it felt like to know the limit was the sky?
If we can find a way to take this state of mind,
then maybe we can unite ourselves and let our minds
unwind.

We all have a flame inside, a soul that's meant to fly free,
So listen to your heart when it tells you to just
BE.

Be who you are,
with no restraints,
questions
or
concerns.
Look right into your self.
It is there you will learn.
Anything and everything you've ever wanted to know.
Plant your love into others hearts and watch as their flowers, grow,
light your candle, then start a spark,
Watch how the world will glow.

Spirituality is Being True to Yourself

Spirituality is not a standard or a set of rules or guidelines that you live by. It's not becoming a vegetarian, doing yoga, or meditating everyday. By conceptualizing these ideas, we limit and bind ourselves to everything that spirituality is not. There's no initiation to being "spiritual," no ritual. It is simply the dedication to understanding yourself and life to the deepest depths, and from this dedication stems the truths of the universe, the laws of love that we were created to live with.
In understanding the many facets of life, we come to appreciate everything that life has to offer, everything it teaches us.

When we are able to understand ourselves, we are able to understand the universe, for they are one in the same. With this knowledge comes forgiveness, forgiveness of others misunderstandings and judgments, anger and hurt, coldness and fear, but most importantly, forgiveness of ourselves. Forgiveness of the judgments WE'VE made, the decisions we regret, the words we wish we never said. And then, with this forgiveness, comes love. Unconditional love. Love in knowing that every single expression of life is rooted in the latter, in knowing that that root blooms into itself, into love, from love, and will never cease to exist.

Being Spiritual doesn't mean that you are "happy" and "cheery" all of the time, or that nothing seems to phase you, because it sure as hell does. I used to believe this crap, and because of it I put myself down, thinking that if I'm spiritual, shouldn't I be on the same "level" of these other "spiritual" beings? Shouldn't I be able to rid myself of pain and fear because I "know" the supposed truth? Why am I still crying? Why can't I live what I know? Why do I still have an ego when I know that's not who I am? WHY do I still hurt so much? I let my mind eat my heart from the inside out until I realized the truth . . .

The truth is...you sure as hell do hurt, and you sure as hell do cry, and you will do so until YOU don't need to anymore and only you know when that is. Pain in the heart is usually a deep hurt, a hurt that takes time to let go of and heal. You should cry, you should scream, you should be angry. LET IT OUT. Just let yourself go, and know that when you are ready, and only when you are ready, your true self will be waiting for you in your heart, to actualize itself. Time isn't going anywhere, so be patient with yourself and you'll find the truth in that patience.

You'll understand that being "spiritual" is actually just trial and error for finding the truth, and the truth is whatever resonates with YOU. You'll feel it, you'll know it. You'll understand the movement and rhythm of life, and you won't be overwhelmed or overtaken by unpleasant circumstances that arise.
You'll understand the contrast of life within the oneness that it is. That pain brings life to pleasure, and that darkness is only there so that it may be lit up once again. Yes, emotions are transient and experiences are unexpected, but it's all a learning experience. Not knowing what's going to come next. Not knowing what the next piece might be to the seemingly never ending puzzle. That not-knowingness, infused with the essence of knowingness- that trust you feel towards the universe that everything is unfolding as it should- is what makes life so damn beautiful, because no matter what, life goes on, and you are still alive.

So throw yourself into the wind, trusting that life will carry you wherever you need to be, even if you have no idea where you are going. 

Oh Life, What Are You?

I've decided to just make a list of some questions/observations I've had lately (with some possible answers). My intentions aren't to offend, just interested in hearing others' points of view. Feel free to comment on here with your possible answers or you can send me an email at bergerjenna@yahoo.com ! peacee to yall <3333

*Christians/Catholics believe that God judges you based on whether you've been good or bad enough to go to "heaven" or "hell." What I wonder is what if going to "hell" is really just us reincarnating on earth (what we now think is hell) until we've finished our karmic cycle and then were able to go to heaven? Heaven being the higher dimensions from which we originally come, our natural state, our "comfort zone.. What if our souls made plans & contracts with God, Source, Spirit to learn certain life lessons and until we've truly learned them and allowed our I AM presence (true spirit) to actualize, we're not yet ready to graduate from this cosmic classroom?

*So I was thinking about Christianity/Catholicism (CC) compared to Buddhism, and I wondered why CC views God as greater than us or of an essence that we are not. If God is everything and we were created in his image then wouldn't we be the children of his art?
 Buddhists believe that the God is within you as well as without, that there is no separation of all that is, and all that is is bound to the laws of love, so I came up with an analogy to try explain why giving your power away (feeling inferior to God) seems silly. 

- So you have a painter who painted a painting. The Painter isn't greater than the painting and the painting isn't greater than the painter, they are both just the essence of the same thing in different forms. The painter holds the emotion of his work within and unveils it as a piece of art without, taking nothing away from the emotion, just merely expressing it, like I said, in a different form.

*What if we are an experiment? (which I think we are) What if Adam & Eve were the beginning and God gave them the option to eat from the tree of knowledge (although he warned them not to) just to see what would happen? What if we are the results :)

*According to Christianity and Catholicism (I believe, correct me if I'm wrong), God is all forgiving and after you die you stand before God in a time of judgement, asking for forgiveness for your sins, and if you don't, you are sent to hell, but if God is all forgiving then wouldn't he forgive you for not asking for forgiveness?

*Again, according to Christianity and Catholicism, you can be eternally damned and perished. What I want to know is why God would ever express himself as something that can be eternally damned ? (since God is everything) 

Anyways, only a few more days until the Christ Consciousness - the knowing of the true self & embodiment of love- is activated. It's about time we allow our lives to unfold as they should.

Step Into Your Heart and out of Your Mind

Love is not a source from without, love is a source from within.
Reach to the deepest depths of your soul and find the core of your being where your truth resides.
There's no need to try and lie to yourself.
We're playing this game of hide and go seek where we see how far we can separate ourselves from ourselves, until one day we snap back into the actual reality of who we are and remember that this pain we feel is not real.
We wanted to have this experience on earth because it shows us what duality and polarity and physicality and everything in between is.
We are eternal beings who decided to put eternity on hold to create an illusory relationship with time.
What is time really?
Alan Watts said, "Time is a measure of a rate of change."
It's a bunch of numbers thrown on a piece of plastic or metal or wood to judge how quickly or how slowly we are manifesting things in our life, and we use these judgments to criticize and ridicule each other.
Kind of like money.
An energy exchange put in paper so that we have a way to categorize each other.
So we can feel "better" than everyone else, or secretly lower.
We've decided to trade our souls for paper and clocks and everything we're not.
But I think it's so beautiful that we've spent our lives so invested in something that we thought would make us happy because that's all we really want at the end of the day.
Genuine happiness.
It's incredible that they've (and I'll leave it up to your imagination on who "they" are) succeeded in encouraging us to fall for this illusion and that we've victimized ourselves by following along as they nudged us to give ourselves up so that we might be able to possess this illusion.
But it cannot be possessed because it does not exist.
And now the time has come for us to realize that the only existence is ourselves.
We are all connected, we are all one, and we all exist throughout and within each other.
There is no separation and no "other."
There is just you and the reflection of yourself found within every crevice and corner of the infinite universe.
We are stepping out of the Age of Pisces and into the Age of Aquarius.
For thousands of years now we've been like fish out of water, uncomfortable in our own skin, trapped in our own "home," suffering without repose.
We've been thirsty for knowledge, but overcome with confusion.
We've been running around looking outside of ourselves, trying to exceed our own capacity by stepping out of our own hearts, but in doing so we've relentlessly given our power away.
So now, as we step into the Age of Aquarius - the water bearer- we return home.
We return home and remember how to swim effortlessly through the ocean of our own being.

Namaste and much love every one <3

Feels So Good

It feels good to give your heart a hug
Its like the lonely teenager who just wants some attention and love
Someone who will listen to them and not judge
A care free love with a warm embrace
A spirit of one who sees past the face
Value of things are not always what they seem
and if you loosen your mind you'll pull at the seams
of the universe and all of its mystery
A history written with no beginning and no end
What if you could be your own friend?
Accept and understand the being within
What if you could ignite that passion in your heart?
Have a fresh start?
What if you could wipe away your past?
Would you hold on to it or let it pass?
Can you feel that in your heart?
Will you listen to it and express its art?
It feels good to give yourself what you want
It feels good to let go of the fear that taunts
Your darkest night
Where faith seems to be nowhere in sight
When you break your walls down
and you let your tears fall down
When you let your blood pour itself all over your pain
and feel every ounce of who you used to be drain
Only then can you touch the sky.

Wish Upon a Star

I'm sitting here and I'm just thinking about how beautiful life is. Every breath I inhale even more of the essence of my being and now I'm seeing life for what it really is. So what is it really? Are you open to receive the love infused in my words or will the truth hurt, just like everything else? Either way, its perfect. Either way its exactly how it's meant to be at this very moment. That being said, what if you could make your next moment even better? What if you could remember the goodness of a moment and carry it over into the next? What if you could choose how to feel? What you want? Where you want to be? What would you choose? Sit there and think about it for a moment... you might even make a wish. Don't worry, no ones watching.

If you could wish for anything, what would it be? And be specific, dont be shy, nothings impossible. Imagine that wish coming true. What does it look like? What does it taste and smell like? What colors are there? How do you feel? Bring the moment to life in your mind so that you can manifest this moment in real life, or, something even better. The more energy we spend imagining our wildest dreams and wishes, the more likely they are to come true. The more energy we spend on thinking about what we dont have, and what we hate, and what we dont want any more of, the less likely we are to achieve our dreams.

The truth is, we can choose whatever we want, however we want our moment to be, good or bad. We are in control of ourselves and that is all so why not take advantage of it? We are our own vehicle, but many of us have become stagnant in movement because we've forgotten that we are the driver, so step on the gas and follow your path. You are it. Everything you've imagined. Everything you've ever wanted. So unwrap everything that you are and choose to remember that this is YOUR life, no one else's, and you can do whatever you wish. You are the star of your own movie and you can have whatever you want because it's all about you.

Law of attraction. Its that simple. Your thoughts manifest your reality. If you think the world is awful, and my mom hates me, and my job sucks, then thats what you'll see, thats what you'll get. Being a female, of course I've had a few things to say about others (its just in our conditioned behavior patterns), so when I would start to focus on the "negative" qualities in a person, then that's all I would be able to see and then I would focus on those qualities even more until I couldn't see anything but that "negativity" in that person. You see we get trapped in this subconscious thought pattern that continues to loop around itself and we dont even realize it. We've become comfortably numb with everything. Pain is normal. Prescription drugs fix everything. School is necessary. Money makes you happy. Life is all about dealing with the suffering. No! This is wrong.

It's beautiful that we've all lived our lives up to now in the best way we know how, expressing ourselves and our love to the best of our ability, but what if we could understand that this is not in our true nature? We are not meant to be boxed up in class rooms where people tells us what to study and what to learn and how to be "successful" and "happy." Education is beautiful, but what is the point of it if we don't even know anything about ourselves? Shouldn't that be our top priority?

Why do we spend so much energy consuming our minds with other peoples opinions when we know them not to be true? Why do we believe everything that everyone else tells us, but we dont listen to what our own heart is trying to tell us? It's easier that way. It's easier to fade into the crowd and give into everyones wants and needs. It's easier to deplete your energy by giving yourself away to others. That way they never question you, that way they never attack you. It's just easier to keep your mouth shut so that others will keep their mouths shut as well. But what if we gave ourselves a challenge and viewed it as fun and exciting? What if we tested ourselves to speak our truth and express our individuality? What if we dared ourselves to do what we've always wanted to do?... and then did it.

The only person who is going to regret your life is YOU. Everyone is busy regretting what they didn't do and the choices they shouldn't have made, so it wouldn't be fair if you actually lived out your life the way you wanted to. Don't let these people bring you down, let them inspire you and show you what you who you are not. Take responsibility for your actions and the situations you come across and know that you can change them at any time. We get so stuck on looking at what's behind us, so we can never move forward. Let go. Just let it go because it's gone. It can't be changed, but your moment can be, so choose how you want your moment to feel and maybe you can live in that moment forever.

Everything is not as it Seems, We are Just Lost in a Beautiful Dream

It's amazing the things were taught to believe from the start of our physical existence. People always telling you that the world doesn't revolve around you, but it does, and if we were able to accept that and allow it to revolve us  instead of blocking its movement, we'd find that inner peace that were constantly seeking. If we let the world revolve around ourselves like we should, we would be doing everything we love, everything we desire, everything we dream of, everything we've ever wanted and more, and in doing these things we would radiate all of that good energy, all of that happiness and security out into our external world. 

The world revolving around you is the most selfless movement. It's our innate nature as human BEings to express ourselves through love in everything we do, to give and receive, to service our brothers and sisters, to appreciate everyone for what their world brings into ours, to allow our worlds to mold together into one beautiful masterpiece, rather than resist the oneness that is everything, so in letting our world revolve around ourselves we allow the consciousness of everything to revolve around itself; love. 

The idea of disconnection is only in our minds. Our realities are a manifestation of our thoughts, so in convincing ourselves that were disconnected, we "disconnect" ourselves and forget, not lose, the truth of our experience on this planet. We are each the center of the universe, starting at the very core of our hearts and expanding outwards into the infinite nothingness of life. We are one eternal consciousness, expressing itself differently through billions of physical bodies, either remaining stagnant in a world we hate, or allowing ourselves to unfold into everything we already are. We don't have to do anything to be where we want to be, we are already there, always. 

Every single being on this planet is the key component to life, for if anything that is in place right now was out of place, we wouldn't exist. God, the source, love, whatever you want to call it, is just expressing itself through us, as itself. We are just as much a part of the source as the source is a part of itself. There is no difference between us and the source. We are it. We don't need to look outside of ourselves for answers anymore because they are all within. All of this time we've been searching, on the hunt for answers, for excuses, distractions, anything to justify our severance from ourselves, but this doesn't make sense to us anymore. We don't have to be consumed by fear and doubt, we don't have to hurt anymore, because its only been ourselves hurting ourselves this entire time, no one else, so we have the ability to heal ourselves as well. And this is the beautiful part of pain.  

As chaotic as some may view the world, as much hate as you may think you see on this planet and the people around you, its only because you see that hate in yourself. When you love something and you know its purpose, it grows, so love yourself, love who you are, not who you are not, because you are already everything you wish to be, you just have to let yourself believe it. We have the power to do anything we want. Theres no longer a need to give our power away or to search for our power from something or someone outside of ourselves because we will not find it there. The only place we will find our power is in our hearts. Our hearts are all connected to each other in a beautiful rainbow matrix.

There's no gap from one person to the next. This space that we've created between each other does not exist. Because we can't see or feel this space, this nothingness, our fear consumed souls resist its nutrients, its beauty, its security. Just like a fish in water, the air is our ocean of unlimited possibilities in which we have the ability to let the current of our own spirit take us away into love. The planet, mother earth, is our root, and we are the trees. In order to grow, we need to nurture and love ourselves, provide ourselves with delicious water and nutrients, and then watch as our leaves and branches blow effortlessly in the wind, as father sky makes his presence known. 

The mother and the father work harmoniously to give us everything we need, everything we've ever wanted, now all we have to do is open ourselves up to receive. Let their magic encompass your entire being, let them fill you with their wisdom, with their healing touch. Watch and learn as they perfectly balance the masculine and femininity of life. Allow yourself to consume the role of the female and listen to your emotions, your intuition, your heart; let yourself cry if you need to. Let yourself feel. Just feel and be ok with whatever ever it is that you are feeling. In fighting off what we think we don't want, we only attract more of that into our life. Let go. Just let go and know that you always have the loving support of your mother underneath your feet and the wisdom and courage from the father sky within you at every moment. Take on the Masculine aspect of yourself and go after what you want. Take action. Believe. Create. Let the prana, your breath, your life force, flow up and down your chakras, filling you with its infinite knowledge. Let your star shine from within, lighting up your path, your purpose. 

Let yourself be yourself and watch as your life unfolds into a beautiful dream.